The Pastor who was speaking made his point about God’s forgiveness of sin with this illustration.
He had recently gone to his church in the evening for an elders meeting. He walked into his office to find an elder sitting alone waiting for him with his head in his hands. The pastor asked him what was wrong and he said he needed to resign as an elder. His unmarried daughter was pregnant to her boyfriend, another member of the same church. The Pastor asked him to slow down and invited the two families to his office the next night.
He said this young couple were beside themselves. They were juniors in college who had been dating since high school. They had stayed pure until recently. They had been raised in the church, made professions of faith, and understood their sin. They were broken by their lack of self-control. They knew the sin was against God Himself and the pastor truly believed that they were not just sorry to have been caught but repentant.
They set a wedding date and you’d think the story was over. But, the next week the Pastor saw the father of the bride and said, “Hey, what color is she wearing for the wedding?” The father said, “Don’t worry, Pastor, it won’t be white.” The Pastor looked at him and said, “If she is not in white, I won’t marry her.” The father was stunned. “What?” He said, “Your daughter has repented of her sin. She has been cleansed from all unrighteousness.”
The father of the bride heard the words of 1 John 1:9, If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
To be clear, there was no question from the Pastor or the Father that both the bride and groom were Christians. They also believed that they were repentant of their sin.
“Cleansed from all unrighteousness” seems to be a difficult concept for many Christians (including me). We, of course, know and expect God to be the perfect “Forgiver,” but what should that mean about how we forgive? Too often our response is to punish the sinner or, in our own minds to look down our noses at them, never voicing our disapproval but neither are we doing them good, or loving them as we should.
Leviticus 19 discusses how we are to love our neighbors. Look at these verses: ‘You shall not hate your brother in your heart. You shall surely rebuke your neighbor, and not bear sin because of him. You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the LORD (Leviticus 19:17-18).
How many grudges have we, as Christians, held, thereby committing a sin ourselves? Why is forgiving our neighbor so difficult when we need forgiveness, too?
A grudge is “a persistent feeling of resentment” (dictionary.com), usually because we feel wronged or offended. Not forgiving that person can lead to a root of bitterness, a long-standing broken relationship where we are not loving our brother or sister in the Lord.
Whenever we consider that God is willing to cleanse us from all unrighteousness when we confess our sin, we have to ask what that means for us. We are to be conformed to the image of Jesus Christ (Romans 8:29). “While we were yet sinners” He died for us (Romans 5:8). We cannot expect Christians to be sinless, we can pray they will be repentant. Unless we are the parent to a minor who sins, punishment is not our job (though rebuke may be).
God is setting an example for us when we see His willingness to deal patiently and graciously with sinners like us. So how must we deal with sinners like each other? Do we have sin to confess?
For if you forgive others their trespasses, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you. Matthew 6:14
As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our transgressions from us. Psalm 103:12
“And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses” (Mark 11:25-26).